Brie Larson has a lot of problems with men, especially white men.I guess he was below the socially acceptable status to ask for a date with a celebrity. She was on Kimmel last night saying how she was begging to go to Vegas with Magic Johnson.
In 2017, she smiled at a TSA agent and he asked for her phone number, if you can believe his affrontery.
She did not specify his race, which means... well, given how much Brie Larson likes to rag on "white dudes," let's just say I think she would have specified his race if he were white.
She went on to suggest that the (minority) male's aggression in just asking for her phone number was akin to rape -- she actually trotted out the "just asking for it" line.
And here we have another case of the movie version being more disappointing than the comic version. #CaptainMarvel #LeaveThePoliticsOut pic.twitter.com/YrJBFZ0QQP— 🇺🇸Kev McSMIRKface😏😏😏 (@PalisadesKid) February 6, 2019
Are men a threat to Brie Larson? I'd say so. Because Evil White Men are trolling her movie on Twitter, making claims like "I didn't like all the hardcore antisemitic propaganda in the film" and "I didn't really understand why Captain Marvel burned the gay flag at the end of the movie."
Men, you see, are a problem, and if they are permitted to sully theaters showing Captain Marvel, female spectators -- the only ones who count, according to Brie -- will have their safe space violated by unwanted penis-based behaviors.
Which is why I am stepping up to be a True Male Feminist ally to lead a new movement to stop men's shitty behaviors and sexual-assault-like invasions of sacred female spaces.
I am calling for all men to avoid seeing Captain Marvel, at least for the first four weeks of its theatrical distribution, to permit the legions of the "Carol Corps" fans to see the film in a positive, Sacred Feminine, female-only space.My bold.
I am calling for all men to observe, recognize, follow and celebrate the initiative #HeFree4Brie -- a full four weeks of only women, or female-identifying (no transphobia here!) persons attending Captain Marvel.
True male feminist allies can best show their allyship by keeping their unwanted, rapish presences away from Sacred Feminine spirit circles.
Now, there will be some who object, and say-- but that would mean that Captain Marvel would make less money at the box office!
Really, cutting out half their audience would hurt the bottom line? Whoda thunk!
Don't be absurd; it means that Brie's movie will make more money. Bear in mind, the #HeFree4Brie campaign only asks men to keep their disgusting patriarchy away from theaters for four (4) weeks.
That means in four weeks time, Captain Marvel will have one of the biggest "holds" in Hollywood's history as men come flooding into theaters they've been waiting all their lives to see since they first heard of Captain Marvel eight months ago -- it will be the only major movie of the modern age to suddenly increase ticket sales nearly a month into its run.
It will make history -- or should I say, HERstory?
Furthermore, this means that Disney and Brie Larson will make more money. It is a fact of theatrical exhibitions that the theaters usually take a huge percent of the box office in the first few weeks of a film's release -- I've heard numbers has high as 90%, but I think Disney, with its outsized market power in the industry, gets a better cut of first weekend box office. Nevertheless, their take of the first couple of weeks' box office is low compared to the theaters' take, but rises after the first few weekends.
So that means that men who avoid seeing Captain Marvel for four (4) weeks will actually put more profit into the pockets of Disney (and Brie Larson, who probably has some kind of gross-points deal in the picture), unlike their sexist, sexually-beastly fellow men who insist on rushing into the theaters and displacing potential female ticket-buyers and reducing their enjoyment of the film with their Male Taint.
It's a win all the way around -- women get to see Captain Marvel in the "virtual safe space" that Marvel #2 (or Number #1) Sana Ahmnat spoke so favorably of, and Disney makes even moremoney on a repetitive, formulaic movie about a little-known and less-liked character than they otherwise would.I think I can go Ace one better. I'll probably wait until it shows up on cable.
#HeFree4Brie -- share it on Twitter and tell all your best Male Feminist Ally friends to do the right thing and stay out of the theaters for a month!
The Wombat has Rule 5 Monday: Komi-san Has A Communication Problem ready and waiting.
I amused to find, in the course of my "research" for this post, that Brie has a hit song when she was 15 with "Invisible Girl", which doesn't seem important enough to have any decent copies on YouTube. She does, however, have this one, which reeks of teen angst.
But this is much better: