Clinton.com - When Only the Third Best Will Do . . .

Choose Chelsea Clinton for your legal bribery.

A college balks at Hillary Clinton’s fee, books Chelsea for $65,000 instead

When the University of Missouri at Kansas City was looking for a celebrity speaker to headline its gala luncheon marking the opening of a women’s hall of fame, one of the names that came to mind was Hillary Rodham Clinton.

But when the former secretary of state’s representatives quoted a fee of $275,000, officials at the public university balked. “Yikes!” one e-mailed another.

So the school booked the next best option: her daughter, Chelsea.

The university paid $65,000 for Chelsea Clinton’s brief appearance Feb. 24, 2014, a demonstration of the celebrity appeal and marketability that the former and possibly second-time first daughter employs on behalf of her mother’s presidential campaign and family’s global charitable empire.

I think it was Glenn Reynolds who suggested that reporters report Clinton's speaking fees in units of years of college tuition for one student. Approximately 4 for Hillary, and only one for Chelsea. That kind of puts it in perspective.

Aw, but she's so cute. . . Chelsea Clinton: I tried to care about money but couldn't

Hillary Clinton insists she isn’t “well-off” and now daughter Chelsea, according to a recent interview, claims she couldn't care less about money.

“I was curious if I could care about (money) on some fundamental level, and I couldn’t,” she told Fast Company in an interview that ran in the magazine's May edition, explaining why she gave up lucrative gigs to join her family’s philanthropic foundation.

Comparing her experience to the average millennial, the 34-year-old former first daughter defended jumping around to different careers — from consulting to a hedge fund to academia to journalism — before finding her true calling working with her parents.

“It is frustrating, because who wants to grow up and follow their parents? I’ve tried really hard to care about things that were very different from my parents … it’s a funny thing to realize I feel called to this work, both as a daughter and also as someone who believes I have contributions to make,” she continued about her reluctant status as a boomerang kid.

The Clinton name likely opened doors for the political heiress, including an eye-popping $600,000 annual salary for an irregular stint as an NBC special correspondent, but Chelsea insists her work speaks for itself.

“I will just always work harder (than anybody else) and hopefully perform better,” said Clinton, who along with former banker husband Marc Mezvinsky, purchased a $10.5-million Gramercy Park apartment in 2013. “And hopefully, over time, I preempt and erase whatever expectations people have of me not having a good work ethic, or not being smart, or not being motivated.”

 So she'll donate that $65k to a needy student, right?

Ashe Schow

Ashe Schow wants a share of that action: Chelsea Clinton too expensive? You can hire me for a lot less!

For $65,000, Chelsea spoke for all of ten minutes, followed by a 20-minute question-and-answer session. She then spent 30 minutes posing for pictures with "VIPs." That means it cost the university $1,083 per minute for an hour with Chelsea Clinton.

But if $65,000 is too expensive for your college, university, trade group or hobby club — and you really want to throw some money away — why not hire this speaker at a fraction of the cost?
For those who like to get the most for their money, here's an itemized menu of what you can get if you hire me instead:

• Bargain basement price of $200 per minute (limit of three-hour event)
• $10 per person for a handshake (light grip but not limp)
• $15 per person for a photo with me*
• $20 per person for a handshake and a photo
• $25 per person for a photo in which I appear enthusiastic
• $30 per person for a hug**
• $5 per person for a minute of light conversation
• $10 per person for a minute of light, enthusiastic conversation
• $15 and speaker will call your mom on your cell phone
• $25 per person for a lengthy, deep conversation with your mom in which I tell her we're best friends***
• $10 per person for an autographed photo
• $15 per person for an autographed photo with message, plus a dollar per character in message
• $2,000 for a private dinner with the speaker (no more than 5 VIPs in attendance)

*Must ask for consent prior to touching the speaker. Payment must be provided prior to service.
**Hugs may last no more than 3 seconds. Hands must be placed on speaker's upper back. Please obtain my prior consent as you provide payment.
***Deep personal conversations are to last no longer than 5 minutes.

My only requirement is a comfortable chair offstage for pre- and post-event time (does not need to be in a private room). Mike and Ikes (original flavor) and cans of (cold) diet Pepsi must also be provided.

The way I see it, it has to be a better deal than this university got.

The Clinton State Department e-mail scandal is starting to reheat, based on new revelations that Hillary and company edited some of the emails that she did deign to release to the State Department. Technically, that's illegal, like felony level, but given that she's a Clinton, it will just be glossed over as part of the package:

For proper outrage, you need Ace and the Flaming Skull: Hillary Clinton, Get This, Edited the Emails She Turned Over to State to Delete Embarrassing References to Oil, Terrorism

Another story the media won't discuss.

I saw someone note that altering official federal records -- which Hillary's emails are -- is a felony.

Hillary Clinton withheld Benghazi-related emails from the State Department that detailed her knowledge of the scramble for oil contracts in Libya and the shortcomings of the NATO-led military intervention for which she advocated.
Clinton removed specific portions of other emails she sent to State, suggesting the messages were screened closely enough to determine which paragraphs were unfit to be seen by the public.
For example, one email Clinton kept from the State Department indicates Libyan leaders were "well aware" of which "major oil companies and international banks" supported them during the rebellion, information they would "factor into decisions" about about who would be given access to the country's rich oil reserves.

Remember, this is as she's taking $100 million from Canadian oil-and-uranium mining magnate Frank Guistra.

The email, which Clinton subsequently scrubbed from her server, indicated Clinton was aware that involvement in the controversial conflict could have a significant financial benefit to firms that were friendly to the Libyan rebels.
She thanked Sidney Blumenthal, her former aide and author of dozens of informal intelligence memos, for the tip, which she called "useful," and informed him she was preparing to hold a meeting with Libyan leaders in Paris in an exchange that suggests the flow of information went both ways.
State Department officials admitted Clinton had withheld all of nine emails and parts of six others after Blumenthal provided 60 emails to the House Select Committee on Benghazi that the agency had failed to submit earlier this year.

There's more. I can't quote it all.

But the government doesn't give a crap because there's not a Republican to hold responsible: No probe over undisclosed Clinton emails, State says

The State Department says there won't be an internal investigation into why the agency couldn’t find part or all of 15 emails from former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton’s personal email server.

“I know of no such investigation, certainly not by the State Department, no,” State Department spokesman John Kirby said during a Friday press briefing.

Clinton’s former agency found it lacked the communications following the House Select Committee on Benghazi’s release of nearly 60 emails it had received from Clinton adviser Sidney Blumenthal earlier this month.

“We were clear about that in our communication with the committee that of the 15 that we did not have, that Mr. Blumenthal had, they were not specifically related to Benghazi, which was the original mandate on the select committee,” Kirby said.

“Again, we only knew about these 15 because Mr. Blumenthal had them and provided them to the select committee, so there was something to check it against,” he told reporters. “We don't know the degree to which there may be other emails that another third party may have, in this case, Mr. Blumenthal, that we do not have.”

And the intersection of the IRS Scandal and Hillary Clinton's Email Scandal. When you need something slow-rolled to prevent excess damage, call for the best: Double trouble? IRS lawyer now heads Clinton email production

A year ago, Catherine Duval was embroiled in the scandal over former IRS official Lois Lerner’s lost emails.

Now the top government attorney is heading up another document project in the cross hairs of Congress: the State Department’s release of Hillary Clinton’s emails and Libya documents to the House Select Committee on Benghazi.

And Republican GOP investigators are raising red flags, accusing her and the State Department of stonewalling Congress by narrowly interpreting document requests and failing to disclose important information.

“The person in charge of document production at two different places on two different scandals has not been completely straightforward with us,” said Rep. Jim Jordan (R-Ohio), a top IRS and Benghazi investigator, in an interview. “She was at the IRS when there was a preservation order and subpoena — and documents were destroyed. She is now at the State Department, where we were supposed to get [certain] information, and we know that some of the emails were not given.”

Duval, a former attorney for the powerhouse Washington law firm Williams & Connolly who left the IRS and joined the State Department last August, declined to comment for this story. But she told House Oversight investigators last year that she didn’t know such backup tapes of the lost Lerner emails — recently found destroyed — even existed.

And a few tidbits from the emails that got past Hillary's censorship:

Email bombshells from Hillary's secret account show she didn't know when cabinet meetings were held, was dumbfounded by a fax machine and emailed aides to fetch her iced tea

on Tuesday the State Department released the first in a series of document-dumps comprising about 3,000 of the 55,000 pages Clinton turned over to State late last year.

They describe the ordinary and the shocking – everything from meeting recaps to the involvement in the agency of Sidney Blumenthal, Clinton's 2008 election hatchet-man who had officially been exiled from the administration.

They also paint the onetime first lady and New York senator as technologically maladroit – she was all thumbs with an office fax machine – and distant enough from her husband Bill that their aides kept each informed about the other's doings.

She used her email to let aides know she was thirsy. 'Pls call Sarah and ask her if she can get me some iced tea,' one message read.
. . .
And then there's 'Santa' Nikkels– the Chappaqua, N.Y. hairdresser on Clinton's meeting schedule who kept her from making it to the airport on time.

'I'm seeing Santa at 8:30,' she wrote her deputy chief of staff Huma Abedin six months after taking office, 'so [we] won't take off until closer to 9:30.'

What is it about Clintons, hair cuts and planes?

Buried in the din of thousands of people devouring the emails Tuesday night, though, was something more ominous for Clinton insiders: news that the State Department had decided to treat some two dozen of the messages as 'classified' – ruling as lawyers vetted the material that some of it was too sensitive to expose publicly.

Clinton and her campaign surrogates insisted beginning in April that her private email server was never a national security risk and never housed classified documents.

But State spokesman Alex Gerlach acknowledged Tuesday night that 'portions of 25 emails were subsequently upgraded' to the classification level 'confidential' – a notch below 'secret.'

As I have said before, it's shocking to me that the State Department bureaucrats ever let her handle anything of any importance.

Saddest Hillary Clinton Email Revealed in New Data Dump!

One of the following is an intentional joke. The other? An unintentional joke. Each is simultaneously funny and deeply disturbing. You be the judge of which is which.

And this:

See what I mean?

This Is the Best Email in the New Trove of Hillary Correspondence

Be sure to catch the last two words of the subject line in this email from Huma Abedin to Hillary Clinton, released last night by the State Department:

Sadly, this only raises my opinion of Al Gore.

And in the how long will the sun shine category: How long will the media keep covering for Hillary Clinton?

Instapundit/Free Beacon: Meanwhile State Dept threatens to arrest WFB Reporter for Covering Iran Talks

WFB: Hillary's email scandal was of her own making (too bad most of the media is no longer covering it) and Hillary undermining trust in her and politics in general

Legal Insurrection: Hillary Clinton's secret #Benghazi phone call

EBL: Are Conservatives The New Gays?

Instapundit/Ed Driscoll: Hidden Hillary emails show she was confused by a fax machine and these emails show what a weak grasp she has of the world around her and no overtime pay for Hillary's campaign workers (many of them don't even get paid)

Newly ordered released emails show how involved Sydney Blumenthal is with Hillary