Tuesday, April 29, 2014

Congratulations on 25 Years of Perpetuating the Patriarchy. . .

Just kidding. To Stacy McCain, on the occasion of he and his wife's 25th wedding anniversary:

25 Years, Sexy Lady!
When I first met Lou Ann, I was living in a one-bedroom apartment south of town on U.S. 41, and the living room walls were decorated with posters for James Bond movies. The first time I had her over for dinner — I cooked hamburger steak, pinto beans and turnip greens with biscuits — we got into a conversation (which is to say, I was lecturing) about how soap operas and romance novels mislead women with totally unrealistic expectations of what love is like. Lou Ann responded by referring to the James Bond posters: “So, that’s realistic?” And I was like, “Hey, you don’t understand. That stuff totally happens. James Bond is a super spy!”

So that’s how I became “Super Spy,” while an old Isley Brothers tune inspired me to nickname Lou Ann “Sexy Lady” . . .
She must be a gem to tolerate you for that long.  I say this with some authority as Georgia and I have a few years on you, having celebrated our 40th last August.

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