Zombie Apocalypse Picks Up Steam

Lots of news on the front lines of the Zombie Apocalypse today:

Zombie Julia Gillard

First, Australian Prime Minister Julia Gillard warned that the world would end on the Mayan calendar schedule with the zombie horde...

"My dear remaining fellow Australians, the end of the world is coming," she says, ...

"Whether the final blow comes from flesh-eating zombies, demonic hell-beasts or from the total triumph of K-Pop, if you know one thing about me it is this -- I will always fight for you to the very end."
..."At least this means I won't have to do Q and A again," she said, referring to a weekly current affairs talk show.

"Good luck to you all."

Being a ginger, and therefore souless, Julia is already part way to zombiedom...

Perhaps Zombie Hillary will still be available to handle the diplomacy between the Zombie US and the Zombie Australia.

Then, this news that a Long Island man shot his girlfriend in an argument over the seriousness of the Zombie threat.

...Gurman allegedly shot his 27-year-old girlfriend, Jessica Gelderman, outside his Williston Park home, according to CBS 2 News.

So what was the pivotal plot point in the show that led to the shooting? The couple got into a heated argument over whether a zombie apocalypse was actually possible, NBC 4 New York reports.

“He felt very adamant there could be a military mishap that would result in some sort of virus being released that could cause terrible things to happen,” Detective Lt. Raymond Cote said a news conference. “She felt it was ridiculous. He’s passionate about it. And it escalated from there.”

It never would have happened, if his girlfriend had been Zombie Mila Kunis.

And then that killjoy Senator Tom Coburn R-Okla issued a report critical of the Department of Homeland Security for holding a skit that demonstrated Law Enforcement readiness in the event of the inevitable Zombie Apocalypse at a conference where DHS paid for law enforcement officers from around the country to attend:

In his latest report on government waste, “Safety at Any Price,” Sen. Tom Coburn, R-Okla., argued that Homeland Security funds allocated after 9/11 to shore up the U.S. anti-terrorism defense are being misused. He pointed to a five-day counter-terrorism summit that included a “zombie apocalypse” demonstration.

Government bureaucrats find it so easy to mimic the slow, erratic, but ultimately predatory movements of classic movie zombies.

According to Coburn’s report, the HALO 2012 Counterterrorism Summit was attended by law enforcement officials from around the country who were allowed to use DHS-awarded grant funds to pay the $1,000 entry fee.

 It's enough to drive an honest zombie to drink.