Reason #5574-5577 That Trump Was Elected

North Korea: Otto Warmbier dies days after release from North Korean detention

Otto Warmbier, the University of Virginia student who was detained in North Korea for nearly a year and a half, died Monday afternoon, days after he returned home in a coma, his parents announced.

Warmbier, 22, had been medically evacuated last week and was being treated at the University of Cincinnati Medical Center. His parents, Fred and Cindy Warmbier, did not specify the cause of death.

But they made clear in a written statement that they blamed North Korea for what happened. Their son was arrested in January 2016 at the end of a brief tourist visit to the isolated country.

“Unfortunately, the awful torturous mistreatment our son received at the hands of the North Koreans ensured that no other outcome was possible beyond the sad one we experienced today,” the Warmbiers said.

Kim Jong-un nervous about assassination: NIS

North Korean leader Kim Jong-un seems to feel “extremely nervous” about the allies’ possible clandestine operation to eliminate him, South Korea’s intelligence agency told lawmakers Thursday.

Due to concerns over potential airstrikes and assassination attempts, the young tyrant prefers to move at dawn and uses his subordinates’ cars, such as a Lexus car, not his own Mercedes-Benz 600, the National Intelligence Services told a closed-door parliamentary session, according to Rep. Lee Cheol-woo of the main opposition Liberty Party of Korea, who attended the meeting.

As he should be.

Left-wingers were nothing if not predictable.Otto Warmbier, Moral Perversion, and the Social Justice Left.

Larry Wilmore:

“It’s just tough for me to have much sympathy for this guy and his crocodile tears,” said former Comedy Central host Larry Wilmore amid what was billed as a comedic monologue on his now-cancelled show in March 2016. He noted that, according to reporting, Warmbier had committed the “international crime” of poster stealing as part of an initiation into his UVA fraternity. “You’ve got to read the fine print on your American frat bro warranty,” Wilmore noted mockingly. “It says, ‘Frat Bro Privilege not valid in totalitarian dystopias.’”

Huffington Post blogger La Sha blamed his “white male privilege.”

In Sha’s estimation, the accidents of Warmbier’s birth afforded him a “shield” from justice in the United States. His heterosexuality, white skin color, and male genitalia rendered him functionally above the law. “That kind of reckless gall is an unfortunate side effect of being socialized first as a white boy, and then as a white man in this country,” she wrote.

Norks Not Totally Insane

Faced with the possibility of handing over the whole country, nukes, ginormous military apparatus and a serious starvation problem over to to a spoiled, 20 some year old four star general with no experience, the military leaders of North Korea blanched and decided maybe they should work into this a little more slowly:

North Korea's military to share power with Kim's heir

North Korea will shift to collective rule from a strongman dictatorship after last week's death of Kim Jong-il, although his untested young son will be at the head of the ruling coterie, a source with close ties to Pyongyang and Beijing said. The source added that the military, which is trying to develop a nuclear arsenal, has pledged allegiance to the untested Kim Jong-un, who takes over the family dynasty that has ruled North Korea since it was founded after World War Two. The source declined to be identified but has correctly predicted events in the past, telling Reuters about the North's first nuclear test in 2006 before it took place.

The comments are the first signal that North Korea is following a course that many analysts have anticipated -- it will be governed by a group of people for the first time since it was founded in 1948. Both Kim Jong-il and his father Kim Il-sung were all-powerful, authoritarian rulers of the isolated state.

I mean, what's the worst that could happen... 

Kim Jong Il Death Jokes:

 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I didn't even know he was il.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

North Korean officials have ordered all the lights turned off in honor of Kim Jong Il.







Oh, wait, the lights are always off in North Korea! - Maetenloch

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


"I'm confused: CNN says Kim Jong-Il is dead, but N. Korean press says he's currently fighting a 100-ft. tall U.S. super-robot.' - Tim Long

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"The kid gets the nukes." - Albert Brooks

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 "In lieu of flowers the family of Kim Jong Il asks you to starve a person to death in his memory." - Gerry Dugan

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Kim Jong Il is now officially a bit of understatement." - Ollie Pelling

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I do think my favorite Kim Jon Il fact is that the first time he played golf he ended 38 under par and got 11 holes in one." - Jonathon Haynes

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

According to North Korean lore, Kim Jong-il's birth was foretold by a swallow and heralded by a glorious double rainbow and the appearance of a new star. His official biography says he was born on White-Headed Mountain, the highest peak on the Korean peninsula. On top of the mountain sits the volcanic Heaven Lake.


Oh wait, that's not a joke; that's for real!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Another true "joke":

Kim was not technically in charge. His father, Kim Il Sung, who died suddenly of a heart attack in 1994, was proclaimed "Eternal President" and never replaced.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 North Korean state TV now reporting that Kim Jong Il actually invented the heart attack.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Somebody tell the UN to throw all his jewelry and sunglasses into the volcano.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 I'll immediately forget where I was when I found out Kim Jong Il died.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I can't wait to see South Park's new episode of where Saddam, bin Laden, and Satan welcomeKim Jong Il. You know it's going to happen.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

North Korean television is reporting that Kim Jong Il will address the nation about his death momentarily.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rahm Emanuel honorarily renames Chicago to Kim Jong, IL

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

North Koreans secretly popping bottles of cloudy tap water in celebration.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I know crazy dudes who wear women’s sunglasses always die in threes, but did we start counting with Gaddafi or Al Davis?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I am hearing Nate Silver’s model will show Kim Jong-un has approximately a 100% chance to take over as leader.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I can only imagine the forced emotions the people of North Korea feel right now.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As we speak, George Lucas is digitally adding Kim Jong Il to the celebration scene in Return of the Jedi.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well, I think we went through all the potential Kim Jong-il jokes in under an hour. Good job, Internet. Good job.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"The death triad of Christopher Hitchens and Vaclav Havel deserved at better third, but... good riddance." - Ann Althouse

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I feel bad for Kourtney Jong-Il and Khloe Jong-Il right now.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I’d like to think God let Havel and Hitchens pick the third.” - Josh Trevino

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 "Shame on the world for letting this fuck stick live out his natural life." - Heart Collecter (an Althouse commenter)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 "Well, now we know what God was busy doing in the 4th quarter of the Broncos/Patriots game." - Derek Hunter

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


 "The first three people to cease weeping will be shot."

 "How will OWS cope with the loss of such a passionate and prominent supporter of income equality?"

                                        both by  Meskito (an Althouse commenter)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The UN held a moment of silence in honor of Kim Jong Il...

Wait!  That's not a joke, that's real!

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------